Back in 1983,I am laying on the floor in the South Carolina heat while watching MTV. Michael Jackson was beginning his reign and Prince was still basically unknown. But Angela would be laying next to me hoping I would not follow through on the order to wash her hair while her sister, Kristen, would be asleep in her crib. Ray would be looking for the light socket with a belt buckle while Twin would be out with his brother drinking. Tina, my sister, would be in her room reading some novel. Angela and I would get up and dance to New Edition singing Candy Girl. After we would make kool-aid and tease Ray. There was no Peggy screaming at me to cook dinner, no Willis hollering at me to clean up the kitchen. I even had time to make friends and hang out. Something I was never allowed to do while being in California.They were my saving grace, this southern household with folks who didn’t really want anything from me. It would be quiet and simple. I could just be a kid for once. This is the place I first fell in love with hip hop and I knew I would always be attached to rap in some form or another. This is were the poet in me became real. I am always am grateful that I had a sister who always took care of me. Even before I knew myself, I knew she was the one to go to for anything. She raised me from birth to age 11 and then again when I was 14. She is my first mother forever. So to that I say…Thanks Tina! and Happy Birthday!!! You know you Rock!!!
Today is Record Store Day. If you are out and about, visit your local independent record store and buy something and get free swag. It about celebrating music at the basic level and discovering local artist in your city. Also if you happen to live in Seattle, one of the best cities ever, the Friends of the Library Book Sale is today. All books are $1 or less. They also have cd’s and dvd’s and records. I will show off my loot later today when I get back. Meanwhile enjoy the video of my favorite Seattle band.
My mother is racist. It is impossible for us to deny this any longer. See my niece, Francine, is getting married in few weeks at McKinley Park’s Rose Garden in Sacramento. It promises to be a lovely affair with my older brother, Tony, officiating and sister-in-law, Ana, singing. Now McKinley is within walking distance to my parents home and is one of most beautiful places in Sacramento. But Peggy refuses to go. Why one wonders? As she told me it was because it was going to be too hot and her bones hurt when it gets too hot. This must be some sort of new disease running in the family (see previous post). Then of course there is the fact that Peggy has favorite grandchildren and Francine does not qualify for that position. But the number one reason she decided she was not going is because Francine’s is half Mexican and the guy she is marrying is black and southern. This means, according to my mother, that there will be lots of drinking which will bring about violence and danger. Besides she does not condone mixed marriages because no good could come out of it and the marriage never last. Hhhhmmmm…Did I miss something? Last I checked her husband of 49 years is a southern black man and Peggy is of Portuguese. would that mean that we are no good and that when she was calling us “goddamned kids” she meant literally and not as a term of endearment as I always thought? And are not half of us married to Mexican. So does that mean that they are doomed and the children are no good? What about her favorites? Are they worse off because they are all half white? And of those that chose a black man to marry? What does that make us? And most importantly how did you get from a simple wedding to a danger zone? I mean really…I must ask God again…Are you sure I am not adopted?
So I get this phone call from Sacramento telling me the latest news about my younger sibling. She was at the doctors and it seemed that she had an irregular breast exam. When I first heard this news, I wanted to question the validity of this. Not that I am a skeptic, just cautious when it comes to health news and my folks. So far if everything that one of us has reported to having we all would be in the Guinness World Records for the most heinous illnesses survived in one family ever. No one would be able to beat our record. But I did not question it too much cause somehow it sounded like a possibility. Not that I would wish for anyone to have such a disease, especially cancer, with its little known factor that basically spreads until it is cut off, literally. But as I have learned being in this family for the last 44 years, some of my folks have a pendency to stretch the truth and make a new desk at work a promotion to supervisor and make a common preventive breast exam into breast cancer. This really should not be a surprise to anyone associated with us 608er’s, but I feel again, that regular sucker punch when my infamous mother, Peggy, tells me how devastated she is cause her daughter is going through this horrible time in her life. I have been getting regular breast exams for the last 10 years on my birthday. I do this because I watched my mother-in-law, go through the process of losing both breasts followed by chemo with radiation. I am telling you it is not pretty nor easy. She did it with such dignity and humbleness it made me almost like her. But that itself taught me to honor this body I been given and check my girls regularly. So Peggy says that one of my siblings is going to be “watched” for the next year or so, I was stunned. What does this mean? I have so many questions, such as, does she have cancer? Was it lumps? How many? What kind of doctor did the test? What the hell is going on? I have never heard of the wait and see when suspected cancer is involved in someone under 70, but hell I am no doctor. Now less than a week later Peggy reports that this same sibling has stomach or bladder cancer. WOW! Now the cancer has left the breast and moved to the stomach! And the miracle is she does not have to spend one day in the hospital! She must have a powerful healing properties or she is the greatest storyteller ever and I am wasting my time with writing. My belief is, as a person with a unpredictable disease, life is hard enough without trying to make folks feel sorry for you because you have some catastrophic catastrophe (which really only happens if you happen to be a cartoon character). Maybe I am wrong, I should pray for those who need help, but I dislike being used and more over I don’t like praying needlessly for something that is not remotely the truth. I do hope that all is well with with my sibling. I hope that her world is filled with peace and joy. But I also hope that when we are in our 70’s and our days are limited to months rather than years, that we don’t have wonder if she ever lived a day with the truth.That in itself would be a miracle on 41st street. The miracle of truth.
Its Thursday and I am suffering from cabin fever. the last day I was outside was Sunday for Emerald City Comic Con and even that was inside a building. There were two days of gorgeous weather with the sun shining so bright we Seattlites nearly lost our minds. But I was stuck in bed with a MS flare-up that is technically still going on. After sitting in the house watching the clouds gather for their celebration of rain I noticed that it was almost 7 in the evening. It is Spring! In the Northwest that means almost 15 hours of daylight. Yes The sun comes up at about 4am and sets at about 10pm or later. I’ll have more hours of outdoor activities! Yippee!!! I can go hiking in the mountains or city nature walks. Every merchant will stay opened later and best of all neighbors will start coming out to barbeque on the patios. there’ll be parties and hanging out again. I suddenly don’t mind being stuck anymore. Just knowing that there is much more of a day to enjoy. Check out our sun at 8pm.
